nicole randomly speaks out of turn

RIP Brandon

Tue, 29 Sep 2009 22:29:14 GMT

I found out today my second Cousin was killed last sat in a car accident. I have not spoke to him in years. Not out of bad blood or anything it just seems my family tends to only associate outside of the immediate family when there is a death.
But it really made me start thinking. We never know when it's our time. I mean he was 18. 18! That's so young! It really kinda freaks me out that he had no clue, NO CLUE that he was about to die and them BAM! it's over. Death plays funny tricks on my mind.
I just need to remember to always say I love you, and never walk away angry.
It may be the last time you get a chance to tell that person how much you love them..

Mon, 28 Sep 2009 22:33:35 GMT

Ok so day 2 (technically 3) of coming off the Meds. My head has hurt alot , and I've felt a little loopy like I just couldn't quite get a grasp on things. But over all not as bad as I was expecting to be by far!
Cheers to being crazy pill free!

am i not crazy anymore??

Sun, 27 Sep 2009 14:59:55 GMT

I'm starting on a new adventure today. I'm starting to wean myself off my medicine. In case you didn't already know I've been on medication for Panic Disorder for about 3 years know. I don't know where it came from but I woke up a few mornings ago and thought ok I'm ready to come off this stuff. So I started today.. I took half a pill. Which I will continue doing for the next week -two weeks. Then I will go down to 1/4. Then eventually to nothing. Wish me luck!

NVM

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 21:51:29 GMT

never mind. I don't want to take the time to transfer everything over here. That's kinda lame...So here's a link if you ever wanna see. http://lisanicoles.wordpress.com

I have a confession...

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 21:50:28 GMT

After trying it out for two weeks... I have come to the conclusion. I love LJ. I really didn't like the wordpress blog as much. It did not have anything special that stuck out to me. So consider me back...I'm an official LJ user again..I'll transfer the wordpress blogs over here though so I can keep them..

I'm in the process of re-arranging my room. I love moving room's around. It gives it a completely different feel. It's like re-decorating for free.. Alan does not love it so much. He see's no point in changing things around, they are fine the way they are. But after living in a room that's EXACTLY the same for months and month I start to get burnt out. I NEED that change.. Ok Now to copy and paste those other posts into one BIG post on here...and to finish my room.

Sat, 12 Sep 2009 20:21:39 GMT

Ok as of now I will be posting on another Blog from here on at.

http://lisanicoles.wordpress.com/

Sat, 12 Sep 2009 03:25:23 GMT

Sometimes you really catch a grasp on how easy you have it. Simple things. Like sitting around with good friends.
Looking at the one you love, and realizing they really do think the sun set's and rises around you.
It a feeling that cannot be replaced.

I've spent to much of my life worrying about the future. And look at what I've got.
I'm blessed beyond what man can measure.
I have a wonderful Love, a great family, wonderful friends.
I'm still waiting for a few things to pan out, but I know that by God's Amazing grace and love it will all add up.

Sometimes when I sit back and reflect what I could be doing today it truly scares me.
Not many people know, but I used to be pretty heavy into drugs when I was younger. I got involved with a guy who i thought I really loved. I was SOO wrong. I now know what real love is.
Point is I followed him to Hell and back. I lost friends. I almost lost my family, and I defiantly lost touch with MYSELF for a long time. All I cared about was getting up, and getting high. God never let me out of his grasp. By his amazing GRACE I never ended up getting hurt, hurting someone, with a record, or dead.
I'll never forget when I finally knew I had to change. My mom forced me to go and talk to Pastor Cecil at the church we had been attending. I was so pissed at her. We went into his office and I had the perfect head nod, and face to agree. But my mind was fixed on a picture he had hanging in the back of his office on the wall.
It was a painting of two cities. There was a giant bridge in between them and one city was the image of our idea of Heaven, and one Hell. and in between the bridge was broke in half, and the people on hells side where trying every way possible to reach Heaven but could not. It really spoke to me.

So that picture technically helped make me the person I am today.
Not one word he said that day do I remember.
But I will never forget that picture.
It's amazing what God can do to speak to us.

time keeps moving. with or without you

Mon, 07 Sep 2009 21:47:02 GMT

To much is going on lately to make time to get on here it seems.
We just got back from a quick visit to Charleston Sc. It was SSOO nice down there.
We are actually going back for an overnight visit on Oct 3rd and 4th, but taking Candace and Michael this time.
Oh about Can and Mike. Only 9 more weeks until little Dallas is here to start spoiling!
I seem to always see stuff to buy him. I got him some super cute outfits today, and some cute stuffed animals.

Not been going to the gym as much been focusing alot on fertility treatment options.
The Dr. want's us to try for a bit longer before we pursue them.
I'm more then excited for Dallas, but I know that once he get's here I will feel some jealousy in my heart. I mean I can't help it.
But I really could not be more happy for Candace.

OH! and I hope to buy mine and Alan's tickets to the weekend to remember.
It's not actually until April of 2010.
(I know sad we are making plans so early)
But those things sell out FAST!

Other Then that everything else has been copacetic.
We're finally at a point in life where we are saving money.
Moving up.
It's nice. Really.

It's nice to be important, but important to be nice

Thu, 27 Aug 2009 02:09:31 GMT

What's on your desktop?
Some cute owls.

What's the last concert you went to?
Maylene and the Sons of Disaster.

What's the next concert your going to?
Maylene please...

What's hanging from your rearview mirror?
A cucumber melon air freshener, and a compass.

What's the last text message received say?
I'm to lazy to find my phone right now.

Who's it from?
I think Tiffany.

What's the last movie you saw in theaters?
Um..wow...I honestly don't remember... Maybe My Bloody Valentine..Yeah Sad I know.

What's the last movie you watched at home?
A haunting in conneticutt.

What's your favorite class?
When I was in School..Drama.

Name the 1st song that pops up on your iPod when you put it on shuffle.
Copeland.

How about the second song?
Taking back Sunday

What posters did you have on your wall as a kid?
Anything and everything Nsync, and Leo DiCaprio.

What's your favorite shape?
Triangle.

Do you have any tattoos?
I do not.

What is your favorite song right now?
I have a few.

What's your favorite TV Channel?
TLC.

What\'s your favorite channel on the radio?
106.9 or 91.3

What's your favorite bar?
I don't do bars.

Do you regret letting any of your exes go?
Not at all.

Do you regret even dating some of your exes?
It was all a part of a bigger plan.

Have any of your friends dated an ex and how soon afterwards?
Once. Pharon dated my ex. One week later...Whore.. lol that was a joke by the way..the whore thing.. oh never mind..
What was your favorite Nintendo game?
Mario Brothers as if we needed to ask.

OK, what Nintendo game frustrated you the most?!
PacMan

What's the last book you read?
The Visitation

What are you reading right now?
Envy.

What's your favorite popscicle flavor?
Cherry

Who are your best friends to party with?
We don't party.. but we do toilet papers family's houses lol.

Do you like anyone right now?
I love one man, and like many people.

so sweet, so typical

Mon, 24 Aug 2009 03:12:03 GMT

Hi, you're name is?
Nicole.

Who are you dating?
I'm married to Alan.

What does the last text in your inbox say?
"luv you. nite."

What is the stupidest thing you've ever done?
I've done more then one stupid thing.

Will this weekend be a good one?
it was average. could have been better. thanks alot At&T.

Are you texting anyone?
nope.

Do you know the full names of the last two males that you text messaged?
yes.

What were you doing at midnight last night?
about to go to bed.

Say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you?
freak out since he is my husband.

Who'd you last talk to on the phone?
mom.

Give me some lyrics from the song you're listening to:
I don't really remember."

Last person you hugged?
alan.

Name something you would NOT tolerate in a relationship?
dishonesty/cheating.

Does the last person who put their arm around you mean anything to you?
it's mine.

Are you happy with the way things are going?
for the most part.

Which is more romantic: sunrise or sunset?
sunrises are prettier.

How do you feel about girls smoking?
the same i feel about anyone smoking. eeeww.

So what do you want for your birthday?
hmm i don't really know.

How's your hair looking?
horrible.

Can you recall the last time you liked someone?
i love someone right now.

Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
i hope so.

How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?
more times then i can remember.

Are you wearing anything on your feet?
nope.

What are you looking forward to in the next 3 months?
my nephew coming.

Where did your last hug take place?
den.

Who was the last person you were in a car with, besides yourself?
alan, candace, and micheal.

When was the last time you rode on the back of a truck?
many many years ago.

Do you watch the Super Bowl?
nah.

When was the last time you cried?
a few days ago.

Wheres the last place you went swimming?
mom's.

What was the last thing you drank?
orange juice.

Where is the next place you will be traveling to?
work tomorrow i assume.

Have you ever broken any bones?
nope.

Do you have any scars?
yes.

What is your current annoyance?
none right at the moment.

How many windows are open on your computer?
one.

If you were kicked out of your current residence, whom would you call?
my mom.

Do you think you've made a difference in anyones live?
i sure hope so.

Are you a morning or a night person?
morning.

Has anyone put their arms around you in the past 5 days?
yes.

Does cuddling freak you out?
nah.

Are you happy?
sure.

Is there a secret you've never told any of your friends?
not really.

Has anyone ever broken your heart?
yes. or so i thought so at the time. now i'm not so sure.

Do you like your family?
i adore them.

What movie did you last see in theaters?
i honestly don't even remember.

Is there someone you could spend every minute with and be happy?
i try my best to be around him all the time.

Do you know anyone whos been in jail?
yes.

Does someone like you right now?
i hope.

What's something you really want right now, be honest?
sure.

You comfortable with your height?
i kinda wish i was shorter. Being tall really is not all it's made out to be. I can't wear heels or i look like this mammoth cave women.

You good at hiding your feelings?
not really.

Honest, do you like people in general?
not really.

When was the last time you laughed REALLY hard?
last night on the way home from bowling.

Are promises important to you?
yes.

Do you trust all of your friends?
no.

Are you counting down for anything?
yes.

What did you do yesterday?
waited to phone guy, went shopping around a bit, went bowling.

Mon, 24 Aug 2009 00:26:45 GMT

Wow I have not been on here in forever. Ok So what has been happening. Candace and Micheal moved in with us. It's been nice actually. Especially since they are expecting the baby in November that means lot's of spoiling time for me and my first nephew. We got a new Cat Annie, a new hamster named Zelda, and a new fish named Money bags. Your intrigued right? Other then that everything is the same in and out. Work, home, clean, live.

Wed, 29 Jul 2009 16:41:19 GMT

I've been back in the gym. I took a few weeks off and now i regret it my results started slipping. But we will get back! Oh this weekend...linville caverns im excited!

day by day they come and go...

Mon, 13 Jul 2009 14:41:00 GMT

i had a great weekend doing nothing. Other then being sick to my stomach part. Candace and i watched WAY to much 16 and pregnant. And then we all watched knowing. It had a strange biblical feeling to it which i was suprised about. But it was def. good.

Fri, 10 Jul 2009 23:31:57 GMT

lJ i have not forgotten you. We just have had a lot on our plate. A lot of good but still ALOT

Tue, 30 Jun 2009 23:25:26 GMT

who made the rule that all the asheville tree hugging,recycling,peace loving idiots had to look all the same. Women to qualify must look like A. a dyke. Or B. someome who has no clue what soap does when it meets water... Nasty...

Mon, 22 Jun 2009 02:13:35 GMT

my house is freezing! Perfect to cuddle up with my daddy to be.

Mon, 22 Jun 2009 01:08:30 GMT

so we went to see my dad today. It was awkward as always... Then we rode on down to Fontana Dam. It was nice. The lake was so beautiful! Im thinking of me alan taking the Jet Skis down next weekend if the weather is nice! Hopefully the sun will be on out!

Sun, 21 Jun 2009 01:32:10 GMT

Im tired. Then Monday we go to get our land survey. I cannot wait until they start building the house! Plus i take the test in one week. Please have worked. Please have worked!

Fri, 19 Jun 2009 20:33:36 GMT

oh yeah and... can is having a boyl Dallas Aiden

Fri, 19 Jun 2009 20:32:41 GMT

babies and beers at the thirsty monk... hmmm thats just wrong. Plus... whos driving your baby home after your beers?

Thu, 18 Jun 2009 23:23:17 GMT

Ok I'm not beating around the bush anymore.
I don't like you.
I'm fake. That's fine if that's what you want to call me.
But please please look in the mirror before you judge me.
I know more about your life then you can imagine.
I've never judged you. Thought you like to take everything I say and twist it like I am.
Apologies, and sad words can't fix it.
I kinda always knew what you were, and that we would never connect.
Everything about you is to fake.
I know this will get turned into me being a judging stupid person.
But I guess I finally realized that your exactly what your calling me.
It's an odd thing isn't it.
I wish you nothing but the best.
But I'll give you a few points I can only pray help you.
1. Figure out who you are. Don't mold yourself into what others are. You may not see it yet, but one day you WILL look back and remember this little fact. I just hope it's not to late for you.
2.Keep you boy in check. We saw him creeping.
God Bless and God speed.

Thu, 18 Jun 2009 19:30:09 GMT

eww why did i read it.
i'm so bad about that. what does it matter. its over now right.
but jeez it happens to much.
i just don't think i'm willing to put myself around it.
i mean how can people thjink things like that when you really don't even talk to them but once in a blue moon. ugh oh well.
so this weekend we are going to myrtle beach for conference.
then sunday going to bryson city to seee my dad..ick.

Thu, 18 Jun 2009 14:51:14 GMT

i seemt to be really good at making people mis-reading what i'm saying. maybe it isn't me though the more i think about it.

Wed, 17 Jun 2009 19:36:40 GMT

tonight alan is taking me out to dinner for my bday. Then i get my suprise present! Im excited. Even though i had to work i had a good day. Plus can goes to find out what she is having on friday fingers crossed for a boy!

Tue, 16 Jun 2009 23:01:01 GMT

so Sam called me and actually asked me to watch kiley for her this weekend! why!? So you can go get drunk! NO please grow up and be a good mom!